HOW TO CONTROL YOUR ANGER

by Yusuff Ademola A.
Anger is a normal, healthy emotion. It is neither good nor bad. It is a means of conveying a message, telling others that you have been wronged, threatened, oppressed…So, it is perfectly normal to feel angry. However, anger becomes a problem when you express in such a way that it harms yourself or others. Chronic explosive anger has serious consequences for your relationships, your health and your state of mind, and could impair your productivity level – thereby you become destructive and less successful due to your hot temper. For this reason, it is essential that you learn how to manage your anger.

1.      Think before you speak: the easiest thing is saying something you would later regret in a heated situation. Take a few moments to gather your thoughts before uttering anything and allow others to involve.

2.      Express your anger in a calm situation: once your thoughts are clear, express your frustration in an assertive manner. State your concerns clearly without hurting others.

3.      Get some exercise: it has been proven that physical activity can help reduce stress that can cause you to become angry. Take timeout, go for a brisk walk or spend time doing pleasure physical activities.

4.      Point out possible solution. It is unarguable that anger won’t fix anything but rather make it worsen. Instead of focusing on what caused your anger, identify possible solution on resolving the matter.

5.      Avoid criticizing others and do not hold grudge: do not attack people. State your problem clearly, be respectful and specific. Remind yourself that forgiveness is a powerful tool. You could only learn from a situation and strengthen your relationship if and only if you could forgive others.

Additional Tips for Muslims
A man came to the Prophet (may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and asked him (Peace and blessings be upon him) for advice. He (Peace and blessings be upon him) said,

“Do not become angry.” The man repeated his request for advice, and each time, the Prophet replied with this one phrase that sums up all good attitudes and behaviour: “Do not become angry.” (Bukhari)

Islam is great religion that deals with every aspect of our life. It does not leave out anything that will benefit, neither does it leave out anything that will harm us without giving way out to the problems. The following are some of the ways to the limit the effects of anger as described by the beloved Prophet of Allah:

1.      Seeking refuge with Allah from Shaytaan:

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "If a man gets angry and says, ‘I seek refuge with Allah,’ his anger will go away."

2.      Keeping mute:

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "If any of you becomes angry, let him keep silent.”

3.      Not moving:

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "If any of you becomes angry and he is standing, let him sit down, so his anger will go away; if it does not go away, let him lie down."

4.      Make Du’a (supplication)

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